I worked all morning – like a creature possessed. Hack called about 1:00 – Read him the latest bit + he had a good suggestion. Went out to see Bob Iverson. A boy with a skateboard was in the waiting room. After a bit I asked him if he had an appt. He said yes. I said what time + he said “2:40″ + then looked at me + asked if this was in conflict with me + I said my appointment is at 2:50. What day is this?” He said Tuesday + I almost had a heart attack thinking somehow I’d lost a day in my writing but fortunately he was wrong. It was funny. I told Bob about the writing + my involvement + Hack + his help. I explained a little more about Hack + [crossed out words] his name + then said of course it’s appropriate as he’s driving a cab which dissolved Bob + then made it difficult to use Hack’s name. Bought groceries + came home. Ate something + went to work. Worked till 4:30 AM + then lay on the couch. Woke at 6 + was freezing my ass off so went to bed. [crossed out letters]
Spent the day working – Hack came over around two and went over the construction of the exercises step by step for me so I could write realistically about it. He’d made diagrams that he brought with him. We sat in the kitchen + talked. Margaret had gone out to get groceries + came back while he was here. She stayed in the other room though most of the time. Told me afterwards that she liked him. Thought he was “very nice + seems intelligent.” “Are you interested in him Aunt Patience?” I said I never wanted to get married again which was not an answer and then went back to work. I wrote all the construction part + got into the proteins bit. I’m over-writing and I know it – Am doing 3 or 4 drafts as I go which I’m sure is ass-backward. Margaret fixed a really nice dinner – then she watched Rebel Without a Cause while I went back to work. Didn’t go to bed till about 2 AM.
Up early and back to work – Had I but started this story on time + worked more regularly I wouldn’t be in this bind. Mary called Margie + Hack called me – Will be over tomorrow around 1:30 – Margaret went to see the OMEN – I couldn’t face the thought. Worked and then napped on the couch with the Padres game on. They’re losing now which is disappointing. I got alot written but not as much as I’d hoped. We (Marg + I) went to Alice’s Restaurant for dinner + then went to see “The Man Who Fell to Earth” – a Sci-fi fantasy film that was really lovely. I had a few ideas while waiting for the movie which I jotted down. Home about 12:30 – the break was good for me + I liked the film
Called Val. Evidently Coast Federal just looking for a way to raise the interest rate. Called Steve Tisherman – appt. at 3. Worked on story. Went to Am. City Bank to sign another paper. Lee de Bourbon upset with Coast Federal. Nice lady. Went to meet Steve Tisherman. Saw Don Schwartz + Dean Stewart + had good time. Am to call next week. Got some groceries + came home. Hack had called. Margaret came just as I pulled in. I called Great Western – Vince [Holian] on 3 week vacation – spoke with a Maxine Johnson who’s handling the loan. She said 2 weeks. I worked more on my story – visited a little with Margaret but really very little – She had things to do so that was fine I went to bed about 2 AM.
Randy Jones won #16 . Also called Steve Tisherman at Don Schwartz + am to call him tomorrow.
Oh dear Penny James called at 8 o’clock. There’s no way I could join them in Disneyland + they were going out for dinner. Nice chat though a little fuzzy on my part. I called Val about the money on his house Not in yet but should be soon!! Help! Hack had some fruit for breakfast + then had a couple of marvelous suggestions for murdering off the Doctor in my story. How I wish we’d discussed it last night. An exercise machine is the one I’m going to use (it would have fit with my other idea too!) I had to leave for the Palisades (after calling to make sure I had the right time.) but Hack said he’d call at three + give me some more details I read Bob Iverson my fable which he liked + then I asked him a few questions about medical terminology – at least how things sounded (that were written for a layman) to a medical ear. Everything okay so far. I told him about Hack in very superficial [crossed out word] terms We talked about New York. He asked if I’d heard from Dick Michels again I said no. We talked more about the mess I’d gotten in with Dick. I admitted it left me in fear of involvement + he reminded me that “involvement” did not necessarily mean “involvement in a mess” Went to Am. City Bank + signed alot of papers. A new paper was there requesting the escrow instructions on the sale of the house here. I was stunned. Told [Lee de] Bourbon nothing had ever been said about my selling the house. She said oh mildly enough + that she didn’t know anything about it. Came home 2 letters from Annie – one with [obits] on Jay Wolf + Harold the other with 2 old letters from mother + Mr. Rice [crossed out letters] the phone rang + it was Jessie to tell me about her party. She’d lost her voice + had commuted to work from the party (which ended yesterday!!) I called her back to read her my fable on my time. She may come out in August! Wow. Then Hack called + gave me fairly explicit instructions on the construction of the exercises. Thanked me for the food, my house + myself – Said he’d call tomorrow if that was okay. Went to take a nap + Dick Michels called from the [Kona Kai] Motel. He’d walked out on Barbara + the damn kids. He sounded pretty drunk said of course he wasn’t. I was soothing (I hope) + said he’d go back + he said he was going to ship her ass back to Michigan. He told me he’d call in a couple of days. Then a man from Coast Federal called. He ended up saying if I wasn’t going to sell this house they might stop the loan. I told him to call Val. Bill called next + then Judy S. Finally got an hour’s nap. Worked on story + then went to Scott + Judy’s for an hour or so. Bed midnight
[continued from July 6th] time. I read him my fable (written with his pen) + his only comment was intelligent (after laughing) We talked about all sorts of things + I enjoyed myself + him.
Bathed, washed my hair + made up. Went to see Merrill Jonas of Charles Stern Agency at 11 AM. Parked in the Medical Bldg across the street. I liked Merrill Jonas + felt she liked me – to a point. She told me they’d been housecleaning + had gotten rid of some 50 or 60 clients but that she’d keep my pictures + submit me if something came up. She had me read 2 scripts for her. Evidently now everything is read on camera. That’s certainly good to know – all taped auditions. I told her I was going to see some other people + promised to let her know if I signed with anyone. Went to the store + bought all [Reuds] [affrint] chicken + [Italian] beans + salad stuff. Came home in time to see the gardener + give him ice tea + talk about our 4ths of July. I fixed strawberries + pineapple + then made a combination dish of sliced bananas, sliced grapes + Mandarin orange segments. Did alot of wash + cleaned the chairs on the top level terrace. Hot day. I took a very brief nap. Dick H. called at 4 + came over. We had ice tea + coffee for a bit + then about 5:30 or 6 I made [crossed out letter] drinks + got dinner started. Mary called at some length after we’d finished + then Margie called + wanted to come over as it was hot, hot, hot in her room. Told her I had company but I would see her Friday night. We went up + sat on the top terrace. It was nice + the first time I’ve used the place except for last night briefly. We went to bed about 12 and that was nice too. Dick or “Hack” as he calls himself grew up in Massachusetts + later lived in N.H. He graduated from a small college in Boston (Northeastern University (?) married young after W.W.II (he’s 53). His wife died of cancer in ’59 + he brought his two children, girl + boy out here to Calif. raised them, saw them both through college + married. He’s part of a company called [Eugray] that’s trying to market a non fuel-consuming battery powered engines + has been at that for three years. Everything at the moment however is in abeyance + he’s been driving a cab for the last three weeks as a [ok] job. Except he really enjoys it. He’s a good listener. Last night he read “Here we go round + round” + recognized 10 of the 12 nursery rhymes. That puts him way up in my book. Plus it’s extremely pleasant to be enjoyed! I don’t know if I need that more than most people but I seem to need it. And there appear to be no complications.
Good day – up reasonably early (7:30) – cleared up some papers in the kitchen – Looked for my watch + going through my purse found a pen with “R.B. Hackenberger” written on it. That was my cab driver friend + I was glad to know his last name. Bill Bosella called worrried about whether he’d have to make another payment. I called Am. City Bank for him + Bob Burke. Answer NO: escrow will probably close around the 20th. He’d given me (Bill) the name of someone interested in renting. Called her + the price was way out of range. But we had an interesting chat. [crossed out words] Terri here about 9:30 + we visited for a bit + then I went to the office to work + she started cleaning in the bedroom. We sprayed the bed + mattress + spread + put the spread outside. [crossed out letters] I’m covered in what has to be flea bites. I called David [Lewis] + his water has been temporarily fixed. Called Peggy to remind her about the [forms]. Worked on story + got a little done. Went to Hughes Market and got some money + some groceries. Called Erdman’s – no answer + Sandy at the B’Way – no answer. I fixed some chicken for Terry. Phone rang + a pleasant voice said “Hackenberger here” (so glad I’d found that pen!) Told him the rest of my 4th of July evening + he said “you have a class tonight – Do you want to get together after?” I said yes but mentioned my 11 o’clock appt in the morning to which he said quickly “understood”. It was left he’d come to the house at 10:30 p.m. After Terri left I started some laundry. Ate the chicken that was left + took off for class about 6:15. Tried to find the upper level + had terrible time but still got there in good order. Jeff [Einstein] was telling about gettting a call from Israel from a girl who’d been one of the hostages in that hijacked plane. I [peddled] off the paper I’d brought Javier didn’t come so I sold his to Jeff. Interesting assignment in class. To write a fable beginning with “Once upon a…..time,” continuing in the present tense + making a complete story which would illustrate a moral. Story to end with: moral: + then the proverb which we’d drawn out of a stack that Peggy passed around. I drew “you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink.” I was frantic thinking I couldn’t do it but came up with quite good + funny story about Hugh the Horrible + Harry the Good – Hugh can lead a horse – – – Everyone laughed. Daniel Goldstein + Jeff Einstein both went for [pains] too. I left before Henry + Jean read theirs. Stopped at Ralph’s for some fresca + booze + came home. Dick arrived arrived about 10:45 – He’s really very interesting + we had a good [continued on next day]
Reallt felt pretty grim – washed up. had some coffee + called a cab to go out to pick up the car. Had lost my watch. Helpful driver who told me the quickest way to get to Inglewood afterward. David had seen the cab coming + greeted me as I alit. He + George, still having no water, were at Jack + Jim’s next door having coffee + they invited me in. Had a couple cups + was so pleased to see them all again (+ establish the fact that noone was mad at me! I’d thought everything was fine but you can never be sure!!!)
Went David went over to look for my watch but no luck. It could be anywhere. The options are endless. Went to Inglewood to pick up Timmy. He was very confused at first but got better in the car going over to the Erdman’s. We got there around 12:20. Dick Erman seems unchanged. (As he said I did!) (But I had some help with mother nature!!) Timmy got rather cosmopolitan there + talked of French cooking + some books + paintings in his now customary wild [crossed out letters] + funny way! But his intonations were so different it was fascinating. He had a peanut butter + jelly sandwich, 2 zingers – a banana + some milk + then after a few formalities + a look at Sharon’s garden said he was still hungry so we bid our adieus + went over to Alphy’s. He had a mild dizzy spell but overcame it to have some cherry pie + ice cream. After leaving him I came home + took a nap. Got up about 7 to have some dinner. Mary called – had had a good trip to Santa Cruz. Said everything was so lowkey they needed a shot of adrenaline to sit down for a meal (I thought that was funny) but that Susan seems really well + had loved the tote bag. I’m so glad. Then some talk of a skirt she’d gotten in Scotland which Susan hadn’t wanted. Sounds as though I might. I went to bed pretty early after futzing around very half-heartedly with my story for class. Keep putting off working on it.
OUR 200TH ANNIVERSARY
Had gotten out Bill [Welbrooke’s] flag from his funeral last night to hang it out. It’s huge – I stretched it out across the front of the house + secured it to the awnings. I called N.H. to wish Dad a happy 4th + spoke
als to also to Jimmy (whose spoken to Dad) + briefly to Hil + at some length to Co. nice call. Called Jessie who was getting ready for her bicentennial blast – Wished her a good + happy time. Called Susan Aston to wish her a happy 25th birthday. Nice chat. Terri called me to say it was her 27th anniversary + we had a good chat. Much better than the last one. I bathed, washed my hair, hemmed my new [shifs] and listened to the Padres beat the Dodgers – Randy Jones’ 15th win. Didn’t feel really top drawer today but by the time I was ready to leave for David’s party I felt okay. Drove out about three. Sat + talked with Bunny Berkeley, Chuck, Harvey, + Francis Clermont before going in swimming. Spent the rest of the afternoon + much of evening in my suit in the pool. Got into long talk with Howard Miller – re Brode + Carson, Dame Judith, Estelly Winwood + many others Also talking Shirley Dougherty at the same time. Very pleasant. Played in the pool with Chuck. Bill T. + Peggy came around 5. Barbara Morrison there. Jack + Jim from next door. Bubba Somebody + Bernie McWiggen whom I got very drunk with as the evening wore on. Chuck when leaving backed into David + George’s water main breaking the top off. Great geyser of water. But no more [in] the house. I was [among] the last to leave + David called a cab for me + bundled me into it. Very nice driver named Dick Something – strange name like Huckleberry. I didn’t want to go home but I didn’t have much money. He took me to the Islander – they were closing so I went next door + had one drink + then was given coffee until my new cab came. Went to Hughes Market + cashed a check to pay the guy + to have some for tomorrow. Home about 2:30 – drunk + tired, but good time really The 1st cab driver said he’d call me. Learned from Eastern Co. about calls Mary had told Jessie + Debbie.
Slept till 8 – then 9 – Didn’t meditate, didn’t exercise Didn’t do much good today. Did work on story + put in Henry’s suggestions which I agree tightens it up + makes the beginning sharper. Talked with Margaret in the morning she “felt so lonely, walking around the convention” – I told her I had to work on my story but suggested she call me later. I did but she didn’t so I called her around 5 – she sounded happier + had had good time. Wasn’t going back tonight so I told her if she wanted to come over come on NO – fine by me. I told her if she wanted to come to the party tomorrow
ni afternoon she could come – she didn’t think so. Macrame got brought up + I stated why I didn’t love it + she was immediately on the defensive + I said I was going out to shop. If she got lonely to call me I went to Bargain Circus + bought 5 reams of erasable yellow paper at $1.99 and one white bond @ 1.30 and all sorts of canned goods + some wine. Came home + listened to the Dodgers beat the Padres 3-1. Tomorrow Randy Jones pitches. The Padres are in 3rd place behind by 6 games now the Dodgers in 2nd behind 4 1/2. I fixed chicken for dinner + zucchini + called Annie to wish her Happy Birthday America + have been writing (+ drinking) the last two days diary, message from Joyce [Pinkston] – will call tomorrow.
Didn’t get up til 9:30 – Hadn’t taken vitamins the night before or aspirin + felt ghastly in the beginning Tony Melia called about the insurance on both properties – said the escrow co. had called him + the escrow was to close on Fri. the 9th. Should he hold it up? I called Val. The money will be in. We talked about the current tenant Sandy – I said her rent had to be raised. Val said $250? And I said no it had to be $300 minimum. We’ll do the improvements but we can’t go for less + he said “Dynomite – your trips to the Palisades have been doing some good.” We decided that if Tony got the policy done by the 9th that would be perfect – no earlier no later. I put out garbage, made bed, cleaned up a little The house is an appaling mess (all papers). I called Mary. Nice chat – evidently Margaret had asked to use her car this weekend. That killed me. I asked why? + told Mary I’d committed myself to 210.00 a month which with the 10% monthly discount allows her 900 miles a month. I’m not paying for gas but for Christ’s sake I’ve offered her work which she’s turned her nose up at (drapes, etc.) + the office work I doubt she can or will do – it’s up to her to mention it again – I’ve had it. Erica can’t go to the Wester Con thing. I’m beginning to agree with Mary about M’s dependency on Erica. (As I write that I realize I did it with the twins + later with Driscilla but I stopped a good 3 years earlier than Margaret who’s been married, divorced, etc.) (at the same age) I called Doug Menerlle to ask him to look out for Marg but he’s not going. Went out to Henry’s – the O’Donnel’s didn’t come so I worked on story Henry home first with a couple of suggestions on story Good but he was defensive – aggressive about them + I put up some resistance but immediately re-thought story!) Bill + Caroline O’Donnel with daughters Rosemary + Kathleen then came + I loved them. Very very pleasant afternoon, evening + dinner. I cleaned up after – got home in time for final episode of Mary Hartman.
Up early – wrote diary. Meditated. Worked a little on my story. Called Val + made tentative date with him + Bill Weds. evening. Called Sharon Erdman + invited her to join me with Timmy but decided to see her after instead. Called [crossed out words] Caroline Williamson + a guy answered + told me to call back tomorrow. Called Don [Pitts] at Charleston + was told to call back later. Same with Pen Dennis (not there) + Don Schwartz (I’m to talk with Steve Tisherman.) No answer at Robt Longnecker. [crossed out letters] My pictures were returned by Abrams [Rubaloff]. I sent pictures w/ letter to Bert + Barbara Remsen, wrote a note to Wes Kenney + wrote Birthday card w/ check to Susan. Decided to give her the tote bag I made Went out to the Palisades, mailing the letters to [Pen Den] + Wes Kenney en route – cashed a check, stopped to see Janice (at Doug’s) en route + moseyed into Bob’s office. Was late. They’d changed my appt to 11:30 last week except I know I wasn’t told as I’d written 11:45 in my book. [crossed out word] I told Bob about Margaret + the “cronic” business + the not wanting to drive around the block etc. etc. + that [crossed out word] I was really beginning to feel bagged. Then told him about Terri + her thing about how I could afford a psychiatrist etc. And then about Jill’s call + her wondering “what deep, dark hole” I’d “fallen into.” I told him how I’d called them so many times when I was really lonely. (like once a week or every 10 days) Anyway – all three situations irritated me + apparantly (as I’d felt) my reactions were appropriate. Bob suggested I say to Margaret “I can give you the money but I can’t give you the moral [fibre].” Ideally to Terri I should have been able to say “yeah isn’t it great that I have the money, I’m really lucky” (+ mean it) Good session. Went to Mary’s + had lunch with her + Les – nice time. Listened to record of Hal Roach, Irish comedian. She brought me a pretty [whirly] scarf + a first [day] cover of Jane Austen’s [crossed out letters] Bi-Centennary. Over to see Tom at 3 – took him to Alfie’s for large meal. He is always pleased to see me but is more + more confused. Went to Sharon’s after – Called Don Pitts + was given an appt by Merrill Jonas there for next Weds (all alot of coincidences involved.) She’s new + thought she remembered me from [N.Y.] “at any rate I do know your name.” Felt very good about it + had very nice time with Sharon. I drank too much but I felt good + really liked talking with her. Came home at 11 – just in time to see Bill’s 2nd Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman – a little fuzzy!
Randy Jones – won his 14th game –
Slept til 7:30 – meditated but didn’t do my yoga exercises. Worked on my story a little. Need medical help. Called Mary about 9. Pleasant chat + I’ll have lunch with her tomorrow (talked with Les first). Margie has moved in with Erica. She didn’t call today. Mary told me Terri’s kitten was ready. I called Terri who sounded very down. Christ – am I getting very impatient or is it for real with all these people? I called Jill and she said she “wondered what deep dark hole” I’d fallen into. I said I’d given up calling them because they were very busy always + she said they never saw people. But that didn’t mean they didn’t care. Well good-oh. I called Joan Korda but she left yesterday for England. I had that mixed up. Called Bob Burke + found he hadn’t rec’d the telegram. Called New York + found it had been sent. [crossed out word] Nancy suggested they call Bob Burke + read him the text of the wire. I said great + to tell him to call me 40 minutes later I called Bob Burke and he was in a meeting. I [crossed out word] met Bill [Bosella] at the apt. (we’d spoken back + 4th four times!) at about 11:45. I measured the rooms because it gave me a sense of purpose. His friend Mark [Ammon] who will do the construction with him was there. The apts. are really quite large. He seems to think we can get 350 for them and I begin to think with some remodeling we can (again I think that). Went over to the house – the big problem there is going to be the fence + grading. Had coffee with Lois + her daughter Prairie who’s 28, an actress, attractive but with all the wrong pictures + things for out here. Went then to the Broadway + bought a couple of [shifts] + a medical book for reference + had an omelette + cheesecake next door. Went to the Radioshack + they’d changed management. I’ll have to write to Fort Worth for my [manual] Home. Called Bill [Tregoe]. Took long nap. Finished stole except for fringe + watched Bill on Mary Hartman – good closeups. Am doing some wash, having a drink + then to bed. I seem to have very busy over filled days lately.
[Crossed out words]
Called Tony [Melia] + arranged to have insurance on my house raised to $70,000 on the building. 30,000 on personal property + asked for earthquake insurance too. He was going to call Vince [Holian] + tell him the raise had been made. Also asked him to call City Bank + make up a policy on the Laurel + Norton property. Called Debbie + said I’d be out around 11. She’d just talked to Margaret who she said sounded “great” – as did Mary + everything was fine. Much heartened I called Babette + got Margie who said she’d been trying to reach me. The Datsun had broken down on the freeway last night on her to class and she thought it was “pretty ironic” because she’d wanted to get the car at the “Rent a Wreck” place. I asked her if Paul Hart Co. had given her another car + she said yes a much better one + more expensive for which they’re going to charge her the same price. I said “that’s why we went to them + not the other place.” She said how she hadn’t wanted to miss her class + asked me if I didn’t think it was ironic. I said I failed to see the irony + she said “I’m not mad.” I wanted to say that I was but I let it go + asked to talk to her mother (who incidentally loved the blouse + shirt). She came back to the phone + said mom’s busy with the roses she’ll call you back. I said I was going out. Was pissed off when I hung up. [Crossed out words] Went to Am. City Bank with 8,000. Was there nearly 45 minutes. Dropped off receipt at Coast Federal – Bob Burke hadn’t rec’d Julia’s authorization yet. Went to D+D’s at Edith’s pleasant [visit] + I could tell them about the “ironic” story. Had coffee + stayed an hour and a half. Went to Saks with my $50 gift certificate + couldn’t find a fucking thing. Really felt terribly. Then discovered I’d left my wallet on Bentley with D+D. Had to go back. Home at 5 + napped for an hour rather than meditate. Went to writing class + enjoyed it. We read stories + did a one sentence synopsis. I like Claudia Krugman. Jean [Apple] reminds me of Helen Slotnick (not [Kepperman]) Interesting evening. Stopped to eat. Home at 11:45. Spoke with a Dr. Carl Trelling at Hollywood Presbyterian. He’s a pathologist friend of Scott Schell’s + he gave me a few pointers on autopsies, [ever] edema etc. Message from Mary + from July Chandler.
Felt pretty yucky Meditated + exercised. I filled out the papers to Great Western + called [Maeola Smith] there to see if they needed my divorce papers for change of name or tax receipts or anything else. No. She said they could look up what even was needed + I can’t speed things up. Made noon appt. with Val. A man came from the Title Insurance Co. + looked around. I bathed, washed hair + called Debbie. [Bekeus] coming at noon. She hadn’t called Babette yet. I mailed the loan papers to GW on San Vicente + then went to the bank + emptied out my savings got cashier’s checks for $3,000. Went to see Val. Tried to ask some questions but instead found myself listening to story of a film about a killer car. Did ask a few things + he called Bob Burke. I have to get an authorization from Chemical Bank. Val is going to put up the remaining 8,000.00 + I’ll pay him back as soon as my loan is funded. I called Julia + explained the situation + she said she’d send a wire saying $15,000 would be available to me within 10 days – $8,000 to complete the escrow at Am City Bank. (That’s true but will not commit the bank.) Had a tuna salad + went out to see Bob Iverson. Showed him Joan’s letter. Told him about Dick’s call. Talked about Spring St. writing class etc. I think I wasted a lot of time but it was pleasant. Went to Henry’s place + he wasn’t there. I went to sleep on the couch. Henry came about an hour later. Had thought the date was tomorrow. He’d been to the doctor’s (his back has been bothering him) + they told him he had an enlarged aorta + wanted him to see a vascular surgeon. He called his cardiologist instead + is seeing him tomorrow. We played a game of anagrams + then went to eat at Alice’s restaurant. Very pleasant evening except Henry really uncomfortable when getting up. He starts work again on the 6th so it’s a real pain from every point of view. Home about 10:30. Worked on stole + watched TV. No call from Mary or from Margaret whom I’d asked to call me. Oh well. Bed about 12:30 –