Let me sort out my thoughts – George + Judy + Brian left today I left first – Went to the store for the insurance papers. Saw Jim Daniels. Ran into Bob who said he’d be out by tonight Went out to see Dick. He’s puffed up again + has gained 10 lbs. They haven’t been weighing him + I asked them to [crossed out letter]. No word about Sunrise yet. I went in to Dana McKay’s + took my first lesson in “rpdrt” (rapidwrite) The wind blowing wildly. Went back out to the retreat + was there til 10:30. Hartley not there til 9 o’clock. Bentley is coming to see Dick tomorrow morning. Hartley told me there is permanent damage to Dick’s liver. He has cirrhosis and there is no telling how much he can be reversed. We are not talking of [crossed out letter] total recovery. we’re hoping for a good partial recovery Diet + rest is the treatment – and evidently the only treatment possible. There’s no way of telling anything more now. I want specifics so badly. I want to know what to expect. I know what to hope + pray for and that’s alot more time for us together. I’m going to have to be very strong and give Dick all the support in the world I can cry by myself. I do think that faith can work miracles but I want to know what miracle we’re aiming for. I called Julia early this morning and she’s putting some money in the Bank of New York for me. Money is no object. Only Dick’s health. He told me tonight that he loves me and I know he does. And I love him even more than I thought I did. I know that now. Dick is the most important thing in my life – without reservations. I got home at eleven. Bob had left. The dogs were inside + deleriously happy to see me. I straightened up the kitchen a little + fed the dogs. The house cold + I turned on the heat. I’m not going out to the Retreat in the morning. I’ll wait til after class. The dogs trapped some kind of animal outside + were barking madly. Still were when I went to bed – 9 messages tonight. Mario is the pool message, Shirley called and all the rest were those same kids. Someday when they’re older + are waiting for important messages + are tired + scared they may realize what they’re doing.